Family
by 2originalcents
Summary: No matter how much you plan, life has a way of surprising you.
1. Prologue

**I care so much about this story guys, you don't understand. I have a lot of Buttman head canons, but this is my "official," if you will, head canon. I wrote a lot of this fic already, but I didn't like it, so I started rewriting it, and I'm still working on it, but I think I'm ready to start sharing it with y'all.**

**I really hope you guys enjoy it! **

**Reviews are nice and I own nothing!**

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**Prologue**

"And now, I believe the couple would like to exchange some vows," the priest says from under the canopy.

Butters nods and is grinning from ear to ear. He squeezes Eric's hands, who has an equally huge smile on his own face, and starts, "Eric, if someone had told me when I was ten that I would end up marrying you, I would have said, 'What? That asshole?'" He pauses as everyone laughs, including Eric. "But we grew up, and we started growing closer and closer, and eventually you weren't just my best friend anymore, but my boyfriend. And now you're going to be my husband, and I couldn't be happier or more excited to know that I get to share the rest of my life with you. You complete me. You're my other half, you're the chaos to my order and I've become such a better, stronger person because of you. I vow to continue standing by your side like I have these past twenty-five years. To defend and protect you always. And to love you with every inch of my being until the day I die and even after. I love you so much and I'm so happy we're getting married."

Eric licks his lips and bites back tears. He intertwines his fingers with Butters' and stares into his eyes, trying to cancel out everyone there and focus solely on Butters so he can say his vows.

"Butters… Leopold… Honestly, I still can't believe we're getting married. I still can't believe you said yes the first time I asked you out, that you reciprocated the first time I said I love you, that you thought it was a good idea to get engaged after our high school graduation, and that after grad school you still thought this was a good idea. You've been my partner in crime since we were kids, and nothing makes me feel better than hearing you say, 'Hey Eric!' I always feel safe with you. And if the entire world turns on me, I don't care because I have you, and I know I always will. You're my entire world, and I've been in love with you my whole life. I vow to keep loving you. To always be there for you like you've been there for me. And to constantly let you know how much you mean to me. I love you, thank you for saying yes. A million times thank you for all the yeses you've ever given me."

"By the power invested in me by the state of Colorado, I now pronounce you husband and husband," the priest says.

Eric pulls Butters in and kisses him passionately as all their friends and family clap and cheer for them.


	2. Chapter 1

**I want to space out the updates more, but screw it. **

**Enjoy, reviews are nice, I own nothing.**

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**2 Years Later in Los Angeles**

Butters storms out of the kitchen just as a plate crashes against a wall.

"Don't walk away from me you asshole!" Eric shouts, following him.

"I can't fucking take this anymore! You're fucking impossible to live with!" Butters reaches for his coat and car keys.

"Where the fuck are you going?"

"Anywhere that isn't here." Butters slams the door and walks to his car. He waits a few seconds before starting the ignition, but when he realizes Eric isn't going to come out to get him, he grinds his teeth and peels off the curb.

. .

Eric is left standing in the living room staring at the front door. He takes a deep breath and walks back into the kitchen. He's careful not to step on the shattered plate and squats down to pick up the pieces. When he's done with that he sits at the dinner table and runs his hands through his hair, replaying the night's events.

. .

Butters feels his anger melt away as he drives around, but he doesn't want to go back home yet. As he drives he sees a nook-in-the-wall bar and decides to get a drink. In the bar he orders a beer and sips at it as he mindlessly listens to the chatter of a group of friends sitting to his right.

. .

Eric calls Butters. It's late and he's getting anxious.

. .

Butters pulls his phone out of his pocket and reads the name. He ignores the call and orders another beer.

. .

Eric moves from the kitchen to the living room. He turns on the tv and watches the news. He's turning his phone in his right hand, hoping Butters will call him back.

. .

Butters orders a third beer and decides he'll call Eric after his fifth.

"Hey, you should slow down," a woman sits next to him at the bar. She gestures at the bartender, who places a beer in front of her. "What's up? Bad break up?"

"I'm married," Butters answers, not looking at her.

"Married? What's a married man such as yourself doing in this sleazy bar? Shouldn't you be warm at home enjoying a nice, home-cooked meal?"

"That was the plan, but things don't always work out, now do they?" He turns to look at her. "Do I know you?"

The woman shrugs. "I don't know, do you?" She smiles, teasing him.

"No, seriously. What's your name?" He asks, trying to figure it out. The beer wasn't helping.

"Lexus," she answers.

Butters processes that. "Are you from South Park?"

Lexus blinks, a little dumbfounded. "Yeah, wow. Do we know each other? No one hear has ever heard of that place."

Butters nods, commiserating. "You worked at Raisins as a kid. You were my favorite waitress."

Lexus smiles. "Well that's very sweet. Thank you."

Butters finishes his third beer and orders another.

"You seriously should slow down," Lexus tells him, newfound concern for her former neighbor.

"You should mind your own business," Butters snaps at her.

She raises her eyebrows and turns her head. She doesn't have to deal with this.

"I'm sorry," Butters says after a moment. Lexus turns back to him. "It's been a weird couple of months. I shouldn't take it out on you."

"Wanna talk about it? I'm a great listener," she tells him, smiling sweetly.

Butters orders his fifth beer and unleashes onto Lexus everything he's been harboring for the last few months. All the pointless anger and resentment towards his husband, how what things that were once easy now seem needlessly difficult, how neither were on the same page anymore, and how coming home was no longer his favorite part of the day.

As Lexus listens, she isn't even fazed by the fact that Butters is married to a man. And a part of her feels like she remembers an Eric Cartman, but she couldn't pinpoint who he was.

. .

Eric lies down on the couch, phone in hand. Butters isn't responding to a single one of his messages. He tries to hold on to his anger because anger means Butters is safe, he's just ignoring him. But he can't keep that up for long and he starts to worry.

"Butters," he starts a voice message. "I'm really sorry. Where are you? Come home, we'll talk. But come home now, please."

. .

After Butters' tenth beer Lexus is slightly impressed that he can drink so much. She runs a hand through his hair and sympathizes that married life can be rough, but worth it.

"You're married?" Butters asks, a little drawled.

"Oh, fuck no," Lexus laughs. "I would never do that. Though, it would be nice, at least to have kids. That's what I want, kids. A husband is give or take."

Butters pulls his phone out of his pocket and notices three missed calls, a voice message, and five text messages all from Eric.

"I should head home," he mumbles. He tries to unlock his phone, but is finding pressing the touch screen buttons increasingly difficult.

"Look, I live upstairs. Not very classy, I know, but you can spend the night. You don't have to go home right now. Plus, I'm sure your hubby wouldn't appreciate having to pick you up all drunk like this." She runs her hand up and down his back. "What do you say?"

Butters turns to her. He notices her eyes for the first time that night. They're a brilliant amber, just like Eric's.

"Okay," he says.

. .

Eric wakes with a start. He dozed off on the couch waiting for Butters. He gets up and looks around, but it's clear the house is still empty. He checks his phone but he doesn't have any new messages.

He wipes his eyes and gets up. He resigns to the fact that Butters isn't coming home that night and he goes upstairs to sleep. If Butters does come home later on, Eric doesn't want him to think he was too worried.

. .

"I love your eyes," Butters says slowly so as not to slur his words together.

"Thank you," Lexus giggles. They two are lying on her bed, and she's on top of him kissing his neck. "Why didn't I pay attention to you when we were kids? You're so hot." She pushes herself up and pulls off her shirt. She then starts unbuttoning Butters' shirt.

"Eric…" Butters sighs.

Lexus looks up at him, he has his eyes closed and seems completely lost in whatever fantasy he's in. She stops, thinking this isn't right. But she feels Butters' erection rubbing against her and that's all the encouragement she needs.

. .

The morning sun is what wakes Eric. He turns around, hopeful, but the bed is still empty. He sits up and rubs his eyes. He looks at his phone and realizes it's close to dead.

Eric gets up and heads to the kitchen for some coffee and for his phone charger that he left down there.

. .

Butters groans and sits up, a terrible headache hitting him. He gropes at the nightstand next to the bed for his glasses and his heart slams against his chest when he realizes he's not in his own bedroom. He turns around and covers his mouth when he sees a naked woman sleeping on the bed, her back towards him. He looks down at himself and he's naked as well.

_NO… No… I couldn't… _

His whole body is trembling as he tries to remember last night. Most of it is blacked out, all he can remember is thinking about calling Eric for a ride and amber eyes.

Quickly but quietly, Butters puts on his clothes and leaves Lexus' apartment.

Lexus opens her right eye and sees him leave. She smiles and snuggles closer to her pillow.

. . . . .

Butters walks through the door, pushing it slowly to keep from making too much noise.

"Where have you been?" Eric asks, coming from the kitchen. His arms are crossed and there's a mix of anger and concern on his face. "Do you have any idea how worried I was? You didn't pick up your fucking phone! I would have appreciated at least one text message!"

"I'm sorry," Butters mumbles, looking down at his feet.

"Well, you're home now," Eric says, relief that Butters is safe and back with him winning over any other emotion. "I'll make you some breakfast and we'll talk." He turns to head back to the kitchen and gestures to Butters to follow him.

"Eric, I am so fucking sorry," Butters says, louder, his voice trembling.

Eric stops and stares at him. "I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have gotten so angry last night. I really wish you would have at least texted me back, but look, we'll call it even for now and we'll figure out the rest after breakfast."

"I was so fucking drunk last night," Butters continues, putting a hand over his eyes. "I don't even remember doing it."

"What are you talking about?" Eric stares at him, anxious. "You got drunk and slept in your car last night, it's okay."

The certainty in Eric's voice breaks Butters' heart. In no part of his mind does Eric suspect the truth. He trusts Butters that much, and Butters let him down.

"I didn't sleep in my car last night," Butters starts, putting his hand down and looking up at Eric, his eyes glistening.

Eric chuckles. "The bartender actually let you sleep in the bar? That was nice of him."

Butters bit his lip. He was going to have to say it. Eric wasn't going to come to this conclusion on his own.

"No, Eric, I didn't sleep in the bar either. I slept in an apartment above the bar."

"Okay." Eric nods, perfectly fine with that response.

"I didn't sleep by myself in that apartment."

Eric's eyebrows furrowed, and he shook his head. "You slept on the couch and the bartender on his bed?"

"Not on the couch, and not the bartender."

"Then who?" Eric's voice shook.

"A woman. Lexus. She's from South Park, she use to work at Raisins."

Eric racks his brain, trying to recall the person attached to that name. He shakes his head and holds down a sob. "No, Butters. No. What?" He closes his eyes, his mind not processing what was being told to him.

"I don't even remember last night, I was so fucking drunk. But I woke up this morning and-" Butters hand went to his mouth as a sob cut him off.

"Butters? No…" Eric looks like a small child, hurt and lost. Tears roll down his cheeks as he runs past Butters and heads upstairs.

Butters hears a door slam shut. He crumbles onto the floor and pulls his knees to his chest. This is his fault and he doesn't know how to make things better.

Eric slams the door and rushes to lock it. He's stepping back from it and gasps for air. He can't breath and he starts to hyperventilate. As he walks back, he stumbles onto the bed and that breaks him. He cries hysterically and screams into a pillow. He hugs it, still crying, and curls into himself on the bed. He's never felt so much pain before, or so alone. Butters has always been the one person he could trust with all his heart, and his betrayal hurt more than anything he's ever felt.


	3. Chapter 2

**Enjoy, reviews are nice, and I own nothing.**

* * *

Hours later Eric is still in the bedroom, lying on the bed facing the window. It was getting dark now and his tears have dried. He's concentrating on his breathing and thinking of nothing else when there's a gentle tap on the door.

"Eric, I ordered pizza and I'm leaving some outside the door, okay?" Butters tells him through the door.

Eric doesn't move. He's not hungry and he continues concentrating on his breathing.

. . . . .

Butters fixes up the couch so he can sleep there tonight. They have a guestroom, but it didn't seem appropriate for him to take it. He heads upstairs and sighs when he sees the plate he left for Eric in the same place he left it earlier that day, pizza and all. He picks up the plate and puts his ear to the door, but he doesn't hear anything. He goes downstairs to put the pizza away in the fridge and lies down on the couch.

He's never felt so much self-loathing before. Butters would give anything for Eric to lash out, for him to be angry. Instead, he can't get the image of Eric's hurt expression out of his mind. He can't even remember why they had been fighting, what started this animosity. All Butters wants is to apologize, to run his hands through Eric's hair and hold him close, like he use to do.

. . . . .

When Eric wakes up, he's in the same position he fell asleep in. He rubs his eyes and looks at his alarm clock, it's early afternoon and Butters must be at work by now.

Eric stands up and heads downstairs. He goes in the kitchen and sees the left over pizza in the fridge. He pushes it out of the way and reaches for the eggs just behind it. He makes himself some scrambled eggs and toast, but he doesn't taste any of it. When he's done with his meal he washes the dishes, not entirely conscious of what he's doing. He grabs his phone that he left in the kitchen yesterday and heads back to the bedroom. He locks the door again and lies down.

Phone in hand, Eric dials his mom.

"Hi, sweetheart!" Liane answers cheerfully after a few rings. "I'm so glad you called, I was actually just thinking about you last night, how are you?"

Her cheery voice makes Eric's breath catch. Of course the world was still spinning, it was just his that collapsed yesterday.

"Honey? Are you there?" Liane is growing anxious.

"Yeah, I'm here Mom," Eric manages to say.

"Pumpkin, what is it? What's wrong? Is Butters okay?"

"He's fine, Mom. We're all physically fine," he assures her.

"What is it, darling?" Liane asks, not liking Eric's answers.

"It's just that…" A sob escapes his lips.

"Eric?" Liane is becoming increasingly distressed.

"Butters cheated on me," Eric says in a rush, another sob escaping him.

"Oh…Oh sweetheart… Oh angel…" Liane doesn't know what else to say. "When did you find out?"

"Yesterday. We got into a fight Saturday night and he didn't come home until yesterday morning, and he told me."

"Oh baby. So… it only happened once?"

"That I'm aware of, yeah. It was with some woman he knew from South Park. Small world," Eric laughs humorlessly.

"A woman?" Liane is a bit surprised.

"Butters isn't gay, he likes women too," Eric explains to her for the millionth time.

"What are you going to do?"

"I don't know, what do you think?"

Liane thinks. Her son rarely asks her advice, but she knows he's not going to like what she has to say about this. "Honey, do you want me to go to LA? I can, it's no problem, that way we can talk in person."

Eric nods. "That would be great, Mom."

. . . . .

Butters walks through the front door and leaves his car keys on the console table. He's taking off his coat when he sees Eric at the top of that stairs.

"Hey Eric," he says, a bit startled.

"My mom's spending a few days with us. I'm going to pick her up from the airport later tonight," Eric tells him, leaving no room for argument.

"Oh-okay." Butters nods. He wants to say more, but thinks better of it.

Eric turns around and heads back into the bedroom.

. . . . .

"Sweetheart!" Liane throws her arms around her son when she sees him in the airport.

"Hey mom," he kisses her cheek and grabs her suitcase.

"Where's Butters?" She asks, looking around.

"Home," Eric answers dismissively.

"Are you two talking?"

"No, I don't feel like talking to him right now. I just told him you were coming, that's the most I've spoken with him."

Liane nods. They make it to Eric's car before she speaks up. "Honey, obviously I'm on your side, so what do you want me to do? Do you want me to act as I usually do with him or…?"

"I don't know, what do you think? I seriously don't know what to do, it's not like I've ever imagined he would do this to me."

"I'm here to support you and whatever you want to do, honey. But I don't want to get involved and attack him, it's not my place," Liane says cautiously, not sure what her son will think of this. She has a soft spot for Butters, ever since they were children, and she knows she needs to be prudent in how she acts towards him in case they resolve their issues.

"Okay, if you think that's for the best. It's not like I wanted you to come so we could put him in a corner or anything, I just need someone to talk to."

Liane pats his shoulder and looks out the window.

. . . . .

"Hi, Liane," Butters half smiles when they arrive. He's sitting on the couch watching tv and stands to greet them.

"Hi, sweetie," Liane walks over to him and hugs him.

Butters hesitates, but he sees Eric take her suitcase upstairs to the guest room and figures it's okay to hug her back. She pulls away and squeezes his arms.

"I'm glad you're here," he tells her, knowing he has to say something.

"Me too."

Eric is walking back downstairs.

"Do you want something to eat before going to sleep, Mom?" He asks her, walking to the kitchen and not even looking at Butters.

"I went out and bought some tea and biscuits for you," Butters quietly tells her.

"Thank you," she says before following her son.

. . . . .

The next morning Liane wakes up and heads down to the kitchen to get some coffee. Butters is sitting at the table, a mug of coffee in his hand as he nibbles on some biscuits from last night.

"Good morning," she tells him and helps herself to the coffee he has already made.

"Morning," he says, not looking up from his breakfast.

She sits down with him and grabs a biscuit herself. "Eric isn't up yet?"

Butters shakes his head. "He's avoiding me."

"So what happened exactly?"

"Didn't he already tell you?"

"Yes, but I want to hear it from you as well."

"I don't even remember, I was so drunk. But when I woke up it was obvious what had happened. I told Eric right away and now he hates me."

Liane has her mouth pressed against the palm of her hand as she stirs her coffee with the biscuit.

"Eric doesn't hate you, he's just hurt. When he talked to me over the phone he didn't even speak harshly about you, he just told me what happened."

"Thank you for being so nice to me, even though I'm sure that's not the case."

Liane shakes her head. "It doesn't seem to me like he wants to attack you for this."

"I wish he would," Butters says. "It would be easier for me."

"I think the fact that you're so torn up about this mistake is enough. Most men pass the blame onto their partners, as if it was their fault they cheated."

"I'll easily blame Eric for a lot of things, but definitely not this. This was all me."

"How did it even happen? Why did you walk out of your home?"

"We were fighting, I don't even remember what about, but I couldn't take it anymore. It seems like that's all we've been doing the last couple of months—fighting. And things were just getting worst and worst, and they just came to a head with this. But it's not like I went out with the intention to do this, all I wanted was to get drunk, I was planning on calling Eric to pick me up."

"This is why you don't drink when you're angry," Liane says matter-of-factly. "So it was just the one time?"

"Yes," he turns to look at her. "Liane, I really love your son. I don't want to be with anyone else, this was a one time mistake, but I don't think Eric will ever forgive me."

"I know, sweetie, I know you love him. And he knows you love him too. I do believe he wants to forgive you, but you know how Eric is. He thinks when he's hurt he needs to get even, but I don't think he wants to get even with you."

Butters looks down and glances at his watch. "I have to head out."

"How's work?" She asks him.

"Fine. I started working with a little girl yesterday who recently became a ward of the state because her mother abused her. The fun never stops for me."

He heads out and Liane is left alone in the kitchen.

. . . . .

"Sweetie, do you want me to make you some breakfast?" Liane asks when Eric finally comes down. She's sitting on the couch reading a book she had brought.

Eric waves his hand. "Don't worry, I got it."

Liane goes to the kitchen and sits with Eric as he's eating some microwaved oatmeal.

"How'd you sleep?" She asks him. Eric shrugs. "Butters started working with a new girl yesterday. Apparently her mother would abuse her."

"How do you know?"

"I spoke with him this morning."

"You know, I get not wanting to get involved, but you don't have to be all chummy with him either. He did single-handedly ruin our marriage, after all."

"No he didn't," Liane says gently.

"What? Do you think I ruined our marriage? What the hell did he tell you?"

"Nothing! I just don't think your marriage is ruined, I think this is just a hiccup you two have to ride out."

"How do you ride out infidelity?" Eric finishes his oatmeal and pushes the bowl away. He stares at his mother expectantly.

She takes a deep breath, ready to tell him what she couldn't over the phone. "Eric, you want to know my opinion about all of this? Well, here it is—I think you're overreacting."

"WHAT?!" Eric shouts, slamming his hands onto the table and standing up, completely beside himself that his mother would say that to him. "You really fucking think I'm overreacting to the fact that my husband fucking cheated on me? If anything, I'm under reacting! I'm still letting him live here!"

Liane isn't fazed by her son's outburst. "It only happened once. Not to mention, he was so drunk he doesn't even remember, meaning it was a stupid mistake and not a malicious action done against you. Quite frankly, if this is the thing that destroys your marriage, I will be very disappointed in both of you."

Eric's mouth hangs open, unable to articulate how ridiculous he thinks his mom is being. "You have got to be shitting me, right now."

"Sit down, Eric," she says firmly, growing annoyed at her son toppling over her. He does sit back down. "Neither of you are telling me the whole truth. I understand he cheated, but what was the lead up to this? He mentioned that you two have been fighting a lot recently, why is that? I thought everything was fine between you two?"

Eric rubs his face and takes a deep breath. "We've been fighting over dumb things. Like, he's been coming late from work and too tired to do anything with me, so I get upset. And when he tries to take me out, I have a commission I need to work on and he gets mad at me for not telling him before. It's a lot of stupid shit like that."

"That doesn't sound too awful. It just seems like you two need to work your schedules out," Liane notes.

"Yeah, but, I don't know. We've been living under a lot of tension and neither of us knows why or how to stop it. Like, any little thing he does sets me off, and vice versa. Everything has become such a struggle, it's gotten to the point where I'm relieved when he's out and I'm home alone."

"I didn't know that," Liane says softly.

"Yeah, and I hate feeling that way, but now everything's come to a head and apparently I'm overreacting," he says the last part with a mocking tone.

"Did you ever consider getting a divorce?" She asks nonchalantly.

"No," Eric answers quickly.

"What about now?"

He thinks for a moment, but shakes his head. "No."

"Divorce never crossed your mind?"

"I love him. I don't want to divorce him, what would my life be without him, honestly?" He wipes his eyes before tears could fall.

"If divorce has never crossed your mind then that means you've forgiven him already, doesn't it?"

Eric's brows furrow and he traces shapes on the table. His lower lip starts to quiver. "I don't want to forgiven him, that's the thing. I feel like an idiot if I do. But, how can I not? It's Butters, I'll forgive him anything, I'd be a hypocrite if I didn't."

"I don't think you're an idiot for forgiving him. I know it's still recent, the wound is new, but let him know you forgive him if you have no intention of leaving him. You're both suffering, and it's not fair to either one of you."

"Just because I forgive him doesn't mean I'm ready to move on and forget," Eric tells her.

"If it helps, your father's wife knew about me and she forgave him," Liane says, looking down at the table.

"What?" Eric shakes his head, caught off guard by that comment.

"She knew about me, and later about you, but as far as I knew, she forgave him," she looks at him and bites her thumbnail.

Eric closes his eyes. His mother has never spoken to him about his father, and this was not exactly the context he wanted to play catch up in.

"So did everyone know he was my dad except for me?" He asks, old childhood resentments surfacing.

"And Scott," Liane adds, nodding her head.

"Fuck," he sighs.

"Actually, when you were just a toddler, she and Scott came over to settle some issues. That's when we agreed that you shouldn't know who your father was."

"They came over?"

"Yes. While we spoke you and Scott played in your bedroom."

He's shaking his head, his eyes closed. "What's the point of this story, again?"

"To show you that it's not dumb to forgive Butters."

Eric buries his head in his hands and mutters, "Jesus Christ." His mother gave him more to think about than he wanted.


	4. Chapter 3

**Reviews are nice, I own nothing, and enjoy!**

* * *

Liane's visit lasted another two days before she flew back home to South Park. She didn't speak to them about their problems after the first day, and though she contemplated being an intermediary for them, she ultimately decided it's best for them to talk things out alone rather than be there and interfere.

Butters is sitting on the couch reading over a file when Eric comes in after dropping his mother off at the airport. He turns and watches him shake off his coat and throw his keys at the console table.

"So she's heading home," Butters says.

Eric nods. He turns to head upstairs, but as he reaches the first step he stops and turns to Butters again.

"You can sleep in the guest room, if you want. I'll change the sheets for you right now. It'll be better than sleeping on the couch."

Butters is thrown off by this, but he quickly nods his head. "Okay, Eric. That would be lovely, thank you."

Eric presses his lips together and heads upstairs. Butters gets his things together but waits a bit before heading upstairs, thinking Eric wouldn't appreciate having him hover over him while he changes the linens of the guest bed.

He waits until he hears a door closing, knowing that's the bedroom door, before heading upstairs. When Butters cuddles into the bed, he wipes tears from his eyes. That's the first night he feels like Eric really will forgive him.

. . . . .

The week passes silently. It isn't until the following Monday when Butters gets up for work that he smells something cooking in the kitchen. He stops at the door when he sees Eric at the stove. He can't decide if he should just head out so he wouldn't disrupt Eric's meal or if he should try to grab some coffee first. As he stands there contemplating what he's going to do, Eric sees him from the corner of his eye.

"Good morning," he says casually. "Sit down, I'm making pancakes."

Butters sits down. He wants to tell Eric this isn't necessary, he doesn't have to make him anything, but instead he takes a sip of orange juice from a glass that was on the table waiting for him.

Eric places a plate filled with pancakes, eggs sunny-side up, and sausage in front of Butters. He turns off the stove and sits down with his own plate.

"Thank you," Butters says before digging into his breakfast. After a few bites he puts his fork down and takes a deep breath. "Eric, I'm-"

Eric puts his hand up, stopping him. "I don't want to talk about it right now. Just eat your breakfast, okay?"

"Okay," Butters says, picking his fork back up.

"My mom told me you started working with a new girl last week, how's that going?" Eric asks, taking a bite of his sausage.

"It's going well. She seems pretty excited to be away from her mom. But I'm worried because she's going on and on about how her adoptive parents will be better, but there are no adoptive parents in line for her. She's going to go into foster care."

"It'll be all right. She just needs good people in her life, I'm sure her foster parents will treat her better than her mom did."

"I hope so," Butters says, soaking up some runny yolk with his pancakes.

They wordlessly finish their meals, but Butters is happy that Eric is asking him about work again, and he even went so far as to make him feel better about his recent case.

When they've finished breakfast, Butters stands up so he can head off to work.

"Thank you, Eric. That was delicious," he says, and he hopes Eric gets all the unspoken words he wants to say as well. Butters stands awkwardly for a moment, not sure if he can kiss him on the cheek or not.

"Yeah," Eric answers, standing up and putting the plates in the sink. He turns his back towards Butters, making it clear that he doesn't want to kiss and make up just yet.

. . . . .

That breakfast is the start of normality returning to their home. Butters is still sleeping in the guest room, but they go about their daily chores and activities together as usual. They even go grocery shopping together.

Two weeks of this pass when Butters comes home to Eric sitting at the kitchen table, fidgety over bills.

"I've been cancelling on commissions the last couple of weeks and we're really going to be cutting it short this month," he says when he sees Butters.

"It's not the first time we'll be cutting it short," Butters says, helping himself to some juice from the fridge. He notices that they're almost all out of food and Eric is looking anxious. "Wanna go grab something to eat?" He asks, leaning against the kitchen counter.

"I really don't think we should be going out to eat right now," Eric scolds him.

Butters shrugs and sips his drink.

Eric looks at all the bills and starts putting them away. "Okay, sure, let's go grab something to eat."

. . . . .

They don't eat anywhere fancy, they simply go to a burger place and they both replace the sodas in their meals with milkshakes.

When they finish they drive to Santa Monica, and Eric parks the car at the bluffs, where they get out and walk.

"I miss you," Butters says, turning to look at Eric as they walk.

"I miss you, too," Eric confesses.

"I don't want anyone else, I swear, I just want you and I'm so sorry."

"I just don't understand how this can even happen if that's true," Eric says, looking down at his feet.

"Honestly, Eric, the only two things I remember from that night is thinking about calling you and amber eyes."

"So we have the same eye color, that's good to know," Eric scoffs.

"Tell me how to make this better," Butters stops to say this. "Please, what do you want me to do? I'll do it. Absolutely anything, I just want you to forgive me and have things go back to how they were."

Eric looks around and he notices they've stopped in the middle of the walkway. He walks over to the edge of the bluffs and leans on the railing.

"I don't want you to do anything, and I've already forgiven you," he says, looking out at the ocean. "But it's still, tough, y'know? I'm going to need more time before I can completely move past it."

"I know, I understand that. But there has to be something, anything I can do to prove how sorry I am." Butters watches Eric as he says this.

"I know how sorry you are, I don't need proof." Eric chuckles. "Jesus Christ, Butters, I've known you my whole life, you really think I don't know just how sorry you feel right now?"

Butters turns to look out at the ocean as well. "I wish I could just make things go back to how they were before I did this."

"Why?" Eric turns to him.

"What do you mean, why? Because I never wanted to hurt you like this."

"So what would have happened instead? I would have picked your drunk-ass up from the bar, and that would have just made me fucking furious and annoyed. I would have let you passed out on the couch and the next morning I would have made your life a living hell. We were in a vicious cycle and something needed to happen before we killed each other."

"What are you saying?" Butters isn't sure if he's accurately following Eric's train of thought.

"I'm saying, as long as you didn't get an STD, this was probably the best thing that could have happened to us," he looks at Butters as he says this so he'll know he's saying the truth.

"You really believe that?"

Eric shrugs. "I don't know. Maybe I'm just pretending I do so it won't hurt anymore, but I think I do. I mean, it's kind of nice, starting over a little. And we haven't fought in three weeks-"

"That's because we haven't spoken about anything that matters in three weeks," Butters says, rolling his eyes.

"Do you really want me to be pissed off and hate you?" Eric turns around and leans his back on the bluff railing. He folds his arms and looks at Butters.

"No, of course not! I want the opposite of that!"

"This is the opposite of that! I'm not pissed off at you and I certainly don't hate you! It still hurts… A lot. But I think I can move past it if you just give me some time."

Butters shakes his head. This seems too easy. "What do you mean by starting over a little?"

"It kind of feels like it did when we were teenagers and we were tip-toeing over the fact that we loved each other. Granted, that was much nicer than this is, but it's the same basic feeling."

Butters stares at the ground when there's a sudden movement in the bushes near them and they both turn to see a rat dash from the bushes towards a tree.

"That's it, we're leaving," Eric says, pushing himself from the railing and heading back towards the car. Butters steps close to him and looks around, disgusted.

. . . . .

After their conversation, Butters decides to step completely behind this idea of starting over. When Eric is out taking a photography commission, he uses the time to leave little notes around the house in places he knows Eric will see them.

Butters buys a bouquet of roses and hides them in the guest room until the next morning, where he wakes before Eric and leaves them on the dinner table with another note. When he officially wakes up for breakfast, he sees Eric at the stove smiling and humming to himself, the note he left sticking out of his pajama pocket.

He sends Eric boxes of See's Candies with more love notes and he tops the month off with a spa day just for Eric.

Butters is starting to enjoy this new opportunity, and he's taking advantage of having his own, disposable income to give Eric all the things he would have loved to have given him when they first began seeing each other.

After the second month of wordlessly romancing Eric, he arrives home to a trail of rose petals leading up to the bedroom. Butters runs a hand across the guest room door before stepping in front of the bedroom door, where the petals are leading him. He opens the door and sees petals on the bed and champagne in ice by the nightstand. He's suddenly grateful that the previous homeowners had installed mood lighting in the bedroom when he feels two arms wrap around his waist.

"Welcome home," Eric whispers, kissing the back of Butters' neck.

"This is incredible," Butters says, talking more about the kisses he's missed so much than the actual set-up.

"Well, I couldn't let you have all the fun of flirting, now could I?" Eric is still kissing the back of Butters' neck as he unbuttons his shirt.

Butters moans but he doesn't move. He lets Eric have full reign of the situation.

Eric turns him around, and Butters' hands land on his chest. They take a minute to soak each other in before Eric goes for a kiss. They make out for a long time, neither wanting to break the kiss and both craving each other's taste after their separation.

"I love you," Butters says when they pull away.

"I love you, too," Eric says, kissing him again. "I missed this so much."

Butters 'mhmm'ed into another kiss. For a moment he thought he didn't even need to make love to Eric, that this was more than enough. But then he felt Eric's fingers hook into the top of his pants, slowly moving to undo them, and he realized just how desperately he needed him.

Their separation had been a gaping wound and they wanted to find relief from it in each other. They're moving slowly, wanting this evening to last as long as possible. Eric is lying back on the bed, sighing and moaning. He opens his legs for Butters, and gets more excited when he feels his erection rub against him. Butters enters him and he pulls him down to hold him, his legs wrapping around Butters' hips.

They both attempt to hold out, to hold on to this moment for as long as possible, but they've both been waiting for so long already that they cum soon enough.

Butters pants into Eric's chest as he's held by him. Eric runs his fingers through Butters' hair and holds him tightly.

"That was amazing," Eric mutters into the top of Butters' head.

"Like the first time, but less awkward," Butters says. They both laugh.

Butters moves to the side so he's cuddling next to Eric instead of being completely on top of him. They whisper and kiss and giggle until they're both fast asleep, content in their new start.


	5. Chapter 4

**I should stop with the daily updates 'cause I don't know how long I can keep this up and I don't want to spoil you guys, but whatevs. **

**This fucking chapter. I'm excited to finally share it.**

**I own nothing, reviews are nice, and enjoy.**

* * *

**7 Month Later**

It's Friday evening, Butters is curled into Eric on the couch. Both decide to stay at home and watch a movie since the week has been especially exhausting for them. They're both completely enthralled with the film and jump when the doorbell goes off.

"I'll get it," Butters says, putting a hand on Eric's leg to keep him from getting up.

Butters opens the door and looks around, but there's no one there. His eyes suddenly make contact with a person sitting inside the car parked in front of his house. His heart drops when he realizes the person is Lexus, and he has enough time to register the smeared mascara on her face before she pulls away. He follows the car until it turns at the end of the street and wonders what she could have possibly wanted. Just then, he hears a rustling at his feet, and looks down to see a baby wrapped in a faded out, pastel green blanket. The baby is in a car seat, a diaper bag next to it. Butters feels dizzy and holds onto the doorframe before collapsing on the tiny creature in front of him.

"Who is it?" Eric calls from within the house.

Butters closes his eyes and tries to control his breathing. He reaches down and brings everything inside. He places the baby and diaper bag on the coffee table in front of Eric, who gawks and the moving infant before looking to Butters for an explanation.

"It was Lexus," Butters says, his voice deadpan. He falls onto the couch and buries his head in his hands.

Eric turns from Butters back to the baby, who's struggling with the blanket in their hand.

"Well, did she say anything?" Eric asks.

Butters shakes his head. "She was already in her car and she drove away. I didn't think people actually did this, actually left babies in other people's porches."

As the baby continues to wiggle around, Eric sees an envelope by their back and gently pulls it out. _Sorry Butters,_ is scrawled on the front of the envelope. Eric turns it around and opens the flap. He notices three pieces of paper and pulls out the first one.

"It's a letter for you," Eric says. Butters turns to Eric and watches him as he starts to read:

"_I'm sorry Butters. I swear, I really, really am. I wanted to keep her, I fucking swear I did. That was the plan, to have her and keep her. She was going to be my out, she was going to be my chance at a normal life. But actually having her, having her in my arms, I can't do it. _

_"I'm not strong enough to give her the life she deserves. If I keep her, she'll just become another messed up kid like the ones you see at work. I don't want that for her, I want her to be happy and to not have the burden of an alcoholic whore for a mother. _

_"I figured her best option was with you. I didn't want to put her up for adoption so she can end up in foster care. That night at the bar, you were having marital problems, but I'm sure they've been fixed by now. It sounded like you two really love each other, and I know you two will give her the happy, love-filled home she deserves. _

_"I know I'm in no position to ask for anymore favors, but please, when she's older, can you tell her I love her and this was for the best? _

_"Take care you three, and Thank You, Lexus."_

Butters buries his head in his hands again. This is a nightmare, this isn't happening.

Eric puts the letter aside and pulls out the other two papers inside the envelope. One is a birth certificate with everything filled out except for the baby's name. He notes that she's barely two weeks old. The other paper is a letter, but this one is meant for the baby once she's older.

Butters tries hard to remember that night, but it's all a fog. He can't even remember being with Lexus, much less if they even used protection. As he scrambles his brain, the only thing that breaks him out of his thoughts is the cries of the baby. He looks up and sees Eric reach over and pick her up.

"Hey, now," Eric coos. "Don't cry. Are you hungry?" He easily holds her in his left arm and reaches for the diaper bag, which has a bottle of milk in one of the side pockets. He uncaps it and places the bottle at the baby's lips, who starts eating from it greedily. "You are hungry!" Eric says, smiling at the little girl.

"Eric," Buttes voice is strained. He feels even worst than the day he came after that night. "I am so sorry. I thought this nightmare was over-" He shakes his head, unable to continue.

"Nightmare?" Eric frowns at Butters, and goes back to looking at the baby.

"God, one stupid mistake and now I have to live with it my whole life?" His voice is stifled by a sob.

Eric moves the baby so he's holding her closer to him, protectively. "Mistake? It? Butters, she's a baby. She's a girl. She's not an it and she's not proof of your dumbass mistake, you should know better," he growls. Butters stares at Eric, mouth agape, not understanding where all this was coming from. "You're her father, you should be excited, not insulting the poor thing!"

Eric puts the bottle down on the coffee table once he's seen that the baby has finished it. He stands up and rocks her in his arms as she snuggles close to his chest and drifts off to sleep.

"Her alleged father, Eric. And what are you even talking about? Do you actually think this is right? That it's okay for Lexus to leave her baby with an unsuspecting stranger? No, the best thing for all of us is to put her up for adoption and forget this even happened."

"NO!" Eric shouts, turning his back on Butters.

"What do you mean no?! Do you actually think we can raise her?!"

All the shouting causes the baby to wake up crying. Eric presses his lips to her forehead and softly starts shushing her. He bounces her in his arms and walks towards the kitchen.

"Eric!" Butters whispers harshly. "We can't keep her!"

"You make it seem like she's a stray cat I found in the gutter," Eric turns and spits at him.

The baby is still whimpering in Eric's arms, but she's calmed down. He caresses her cheek with his fingers and happily murmurs to her until she's fallen back asleep. Butters walks towards him, but he backs up until his back hits the kitchen counter.

"Why are you reacting this way?" Butters asks. "Why are you acting like this isn't a big deal? She's always going to just be proof-"

"Proof of what?" Eric interrupts him. "She's a baby! She had nothing to do with any of that and I'm not going to let you scapegoat her!"

"So you want to raise Lexus' baby?"

"I want to raise your baby," Eric corrects him.

Butters sighs and rubs his face with his hands. He pulls out a chair from the kitchen table and sits down.

"It's unbelievable to me that you don't get it," Eric says.

Butters looks up at him. "Explain it to me, then."

At first Eric looks down at sleeping baby in his arms. He smiles at her as she sucks on her tiny fist. Butters watches him and observes how content and relaxed he looks, like a proud father.

"We've talked for hours on end about how your parents suck, and in a lot of ways they do," Eric starts. "But the one right thing they did was get married and plan you. I wasn't planned and I never had a real family. I'm just the bastard son of the town whore." He shrugs and smiles sadly. Butters wants to interrupt, to defend Eric, but he keeps his mouth shut.

"And look, I love my mom, I swear I do. I mean, she totally helped us both when this wheel first started spinning," he continues. "But she was so helpful because she's seen families work things out, even after she's the one who started the rift in the first place. I love her, but it's hard not to feel a little resentment. She loves me too, but she let really fucking awful things happen to me because she just wasn't a fit mother. She didn't raise me well and I had to fuck up a million times until I started figuring stuff out for myself.

"And everyday I had to hear someone call her a whore, and every fucking night I had to stay in my room while she proved them right. I've told you this, that all I ever wanted was for one of those guys to just stay so that I could have a real family." Eric takes a deep breath. "Right now, Lexus is trying to protect this little girl from having the life I had, if not a worst one. She's trying to give her a real family, and I want to help her."

Butters' brows are furrowed as he concentrates on everything Eric is saying, really attempting to soak all his words in.

"We can give her a better life, Butters. You and me, we can giver her the home I never had. Please, Butters," Eric pleads. "I don't want her to go through that, she doesn't deserve it. No one deserves it. Please, let's raise her together."

Butters stands up and walks towards Eric, whose head is hanging and he tries to bite back tears.

"She's not a nightmare or a mistake," Eric whimpers. "And if you really believe that, then all those times you told me I'm not were lies."

Butters cups Eric's face with his hands and lifts his head. "They weren't lies," he tells him softly and kisses him. He looks down at the sleeping girl in Eric's arms and chews on his bottom lip. What Eric wants isn't going to be easy for him, but understanding now where he's coming from, Butters thinks he can raise this little girl. He softly pets the tuft of light brown, almost blond, hair and looks at Eric.

"I just have one request, Eric. Just one and after we can set everything in motion so you can officially adopt her and everything."

"What?" Eric asks, a bit nervous.

"A paternity test. I just want to make sure."

"You know, I believe Lexus when she says she planned this baby out. But okay, if it'll give you peace of mind, we'll do a paternity test."

They kiss and Butters looks back down at the baby. "Can I hold her?"

Eric nods enthusiastically and gently hands her over to him so she wouldn't wake up. She stirs in Butters' arms, but he shushes her. Eric runs his fingers over her head to lull her back to sleep.

"Let's go to the couch," Butters whispers.

He sits down with the baby still in his arms. Eric puts his arm around his shoulders and rubs her forehead with the pad of his thumb.

"What's her name? Did it say in the letter?" Butters asks, turning to Eric.

"No, and her name is blank on the birth certificate too. Guess her mom wanted to give us the honor."

"Well that's exciting," Butters says, cracking his first genuine smile of the evening. "What should we name her?"

"I don't know. Do you want to name her after your mom?"

Butters scrunches his nose and shakes his head. "One Linda in my life is plenty. What about your mom?"

"Hell no," Eric says. "I want to break this vicious cycle, remember?"

Butters smiles. "Linda, Liane, Lexus. Those are a lot of Ls."

Eric thinks about that. "Leopold."

"Yes?" Butters snorts.

Eric cocks his head and smiles. "Lee. We should name her Lee."

"Lee?"

"Yeah, it sticks to the L theme and it's kind of like naming her after you."

"Why would we want to name her after me? I don't even want to be named after me, hence Butters."

"Well I think it's a great name for her," Eric says matter-of-factly.

"Lee," Butters repeats, trying out the name.

"Her middle name can be Marjorine," Eric adds, laughing.

"I thought we wanted to be good parents," Butters says, rolling his eyes. "Lee Stotch-Cartman. Should she have a middle name?"

"I don't know. I can't think of a good middle name."

"Erica. Lee Erica Stotch-Cartman."

"Doesn't really roll off your tongue," Eric complains.

"Who cares, who's going to say her whole name anyway?"

Eric nods. "We just named our daughter."

Butters smiles and kisses her forehead.


	6. Chapter 5

**Uh, so expect longer delays from me guys. Sorry, but, y'know, school. **

**Anywho, reviews are nice, I own nothing, and enjoy.**

* * *

After cooing over her a while longer, Butters decides it's time for her to sleep in a bed instead of in their arms. They head up to the guest room and Butters stands in the doorway, Lee in his arms, as he watches Eric line the bed with blankets and pillows so Lee can't roll off. Once he's done with that he takes Lee from Butters and carefully wraps her snuggly in the blanket she came with. He places her on her back and kisses her forehead before walking over to Butters.

Butters turns off the light and they check her over one last time before he closes the door.

"Instinct seems to have kicked in for you, huh?" He tells Eric as they head downstairs.

"What do you mean?" Eric asks him.

"You're a dad for barely four hours and you already have it down," Butters says, admiration coloring his voice.

"Oh, does it seem that way?" He says. There's a noise and it causes him to jump and almost run back upstairs but Butters grabs his arm.

"It was the step. I stepped on the loose floor board, everything is okay," he assured him.

"I don't know," Eric starts, looking up the stairs. "I don't like leaving her alone in that room. I can get a cheap baby monitor at a pharmacy real quick and come back."

"She'll be fine. It's only for one night. Tomorrow we'll buy all the things she needs. Don't worry."

The walk back into the kitchen and Butters grabs the diaper bag and envelope with the three papers from the coffee table and sets them down on the dinner table. He sits down as Eric makes them some tea. He opens the bag and goes through all the items one by one.

"Ten diapers, a packet of baby wipes, a can of powdered baby formula, a clean bottle, a change of clothes, two packs of baby food, and a pacifier," Butters lists off, holding the pacifier in his hand.

"Just enough for a night," Eric says, putting a cup of tea in front of both of them. He grabs the envelope and takes out the three papers inside, unfolding them and placing them carefully next to each other.

"What's that?" Butters asks, pointing at a letter furthest from him. The one closest to him is the letter addressed to him and the one in the middle is Lee's birth certificate.

"It's another letter meant for Lee. I haven't read it yet, though," Eric says, handing it over to Butters.

Butters eyes it over before reading it out loud:

"_Baby girl, It's up to your dads if you ever read this, but if you do I just want you to know how much I love you. I have a hunch you're so happy you don't even want to know about me, but in case you are asking, you just need to trust that this was for the best. _

_I guess no matter what I'll always be your mom, but that doesn't mean much. You wouldn't want me as a real mom anyway, I would just be an embarrassment for you. And not in a cute, uncool way, but in a very bad way, so to keep you from that, I thought it would be better to leave you with your cool dads. _

_If you ever want to contact me, and your dads are okay with it, I'll gladly see you with open arms. If you don't ever contact me, I'll understand. _

_I love you to the moon and back, Mom."_

Butters put the letter down. "Wow."

"She really had faith we'd stay together," Eric says, acknowledging all the times Lexus wrote "dads."

"Yeah she did, I wonder why?"

"Maybe something you said while you were shit-face?"

Butters smoothes the letter in front of him and his eyes wander to all the baby things.

"What are you thinking?" Eric asks when he sees him lost in thought.

"Just how complicated this whole thing is," he answers. "Eric, I don't know how to ask this but… Knowing what you know now, are you happy your mother kept you, or do you wish she would have given you up?"

"It depends. Sometimes I wonder how different my life would have turned out if I did have a stable family, but for the most part I'm glad she kept me, because I really like where I am right now. And you need to go through a lot of shit to get anything good."

They stay quiet for a while before Eric speaks up again. "It is just the first night, but I do think Lee should have some contact with her mom when she's older."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I don't think Lexus should be punished just because she realized she didn't actually want to be a mom. And, well, it sucks to grow up not knowing who one of your parents is. If Lee ever asks, she should know. No secrets or stupid conspiracies."

"Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm really glad I have you to navigate all of this with. You're on the other side of this story, and it helps a lot."

Eric smiles. "Well, it's kind of nice that all the shit I went through is going to good use."

. . . . .

In the morning Eric opens the door to the guest room and he smiles when he sees Lee squirming around.

"Good morning," he says in a singsong voice. He pulls her out of her blanket and picks her up to kiss her temple. "How'd you sleep, angel?"

He takes her downstairs and into the kitchen where they left the diaper bag. He takes off the pajamas she was in last night and changes her diaper, which was easier and less disgusting than he thought it would be. He checks to make sure she doesn't have diaper rash and then changes her into the extra clothes that they were given.

Eric is reading the label of the baby formula when Butters walks in.

"Morning," he says, walking over and smiling at Lee who's sitting in her car seat on top of the table looking around. He walks over to Eric and kisses his cheek. "Don't think so hard, just get some water and pour some of the powder in, easy-peasy." He puts the coffee on for both of them.

"This stuff is super off-brand, I don't really want to give it to her," Eric says, turning the can in his hand.

"She has to eat something. I'm sure she can handle one more morning of it and we'll buy her the good stuff today."

Eric whines, but he ultimately washes the extra bottle and makes Lee's breakfast with it. As he holds and feeds her, Butters is busy making their own breakfast.

"Do you think we should buy big things now or wait until after?" Butters ventures to ask as he makes omelettes.

"What do you mean?" Eric turns to him, he's sitting down with Lee in his arms.

"I mean a crib and stroller and stuff like that. Do you think we should wait until after we get a paternity test?" Butters doesn't look at him when he says this.

Eric thinks for a moment before answering. "So if she's not yours, you for sure don't want to raise her?"

"I seem so cruel, but… Why should we raise her?"

"I heard about these do-it-yourself tests where you send your DNA samples to a lab and they mail you the results in, like, five days. We can get that today and just buy her enough food and diapers to last the week. Maybe another change of clothes." He's looking down at the baby as he says this, and he knows there's no way now he can give her up, Butters' or not, Eric wants to keep her.

"Sounds like a plan to me," Butters says, placing an omelette in front of Eric.

. . . . .

Butters is kind to Lee, but he treats her with the same emotional distance he treats the children he works with. He isn't letting himself grow too attached, but he observes Eric in the mall and is worried it's too late for him.

"I can hold her if you're getting tired," Butters says when he sees Eric give her another kiss on her head.

"No, I'm fine. She doesn't weigh a thing," Eric answers, looking through the window of a sweetshop.

"Are you sure?" Butters nudges him. He's holding their purchases in one hand.

"Yeah, I'm sure, why? Are the bags getting too heavy for you?"

"No, I'm fine."

"Okay then."

Butters internally groans.

. . . . .

When they make it to their car Butters opens the DIY paternity test kit they bought and reads it thoroughly. They're already out so they figure it would be best to get this done as quickly as possible and send in the samples before the post office closes for the day.

"It says they'll email us the results in two days," Butters says, reading over the instructions, two cheek swabs in his other hand. "Ugh, and there's an extra lab fee. Oh well."

He opens one of the plastic tubes and removes the cheek swab within it. He rubs the inside of his cheek with it and puts it back in the tube.

"Your turn, little lady," Butters says as he gently opens Lee's mouth. She wiggles in Eric's arms but he soothes her by petting her hair.

Butters fills out the forms that came with the kit and puts everything in the pre-paid envelope that also came with it.

"Okay, so we just have to send this in and in two days we should know if she's really mine or not." Butters taps the package in his lap.

"Yeah," Eric says, trying to muster up some enthusiasm. He gets out of the car to put Lee in her car seat in the back. He leaves a stuffed frog he bought for her on her stomach and she moves its arms around.

They quickly stop at the post office and Butters drops off the package.

. . . . .

That evening Butters is on the couch watching the news. After the second commercial break he realizes Eric is taking a long time putting Lee to bed. He goes upstairs, the guest room door is open and he sees him sitting at the edge of the bed, rubbing Lee's chest with his thumb.

Butters knocks on the doorframe and Eric turns to see him.

"I want to keep her, even if she isn't yours, I want to keep her," Eric says, turning back to Lee.

Butters sighs and walks towards him. He leans against the wall closest to him and crosses his arm.

"I know you have this feeling of responsibility towards her, but if she's not mine… We had decided that we didn't want children years ago, remember?"

"Yeah, and that was a stupid decision," Eric turns to him. "Maybe we do need a kid, maybe that's why we went through all that shit, because we were so focused on each other, we need to put some of our energy elsewhere."

"Children never resolve marital problems. Trust me, Eric, they just cover the bigger problems for a little while. And it's not fair to put that responsibility on them."

"We already resolved our bigger problems, though! And maybe she'll keep them from surfacing again."

"That's not a good reason to want a child."

"I want to keep her," Eric says firmly, turning back to Lee. "I want to keep her so bad, I really do. I want to raise her with you. I want to have a family with you, Butters. I want to do all that shit with you. The only reason I ever said I didn't want to have kids is because I was afraid I would fuck it up, but I'm not afraid anymore!" He turns to Butters. "I think I can do this! And I know you can do it, I mean, you're practically a parent to all the kids you see at work. I don't want it to just be the two of us anymore, I want her here too."

Butters rubs his forehead. He never thought he would be having this problem with Eric. "We'll wait for the test results to come in. Until then, she's sleeping, we should go downstairs and let her rest."

Eric wipes tears from his eyes and looks at the sleeping infant one more time before getting up and leaving the room. Butters rubs her stomach and heads out, closing the door behind him.

. . . . .

"Eric!" Butters is excited when he arrives home from work three days later.

"What?" Eric asks, concerned. He's sitting on the couch with Lee in his left arm, the stuffed frog he bought for her in his right hand.

"I got an email, the test results are in. I didn't open it, though, I wanted to read it with you," he says breathless. He sits next to him and takes his laptop out of his bag and opens it up.

Eric takes a deep breath and looks down at Lee, who's reaching for the stuffed frog. He places it on top of her and smiles when he sees her chewing on one of its hands.

Butters has his emails open and hesitates to open the message.

"Just read it already, we can't live like this anymore," Eric tells him.

Butters nods and opens the message. He quickly scans it and puts his hand to his mouth, tears falling from his eyes. He stands and puts his laptop on the couch in an angle that Eric can read it. As he paces, Eric quickly reads the message and laughs.

"Ninety-nine point ninety-nine percent. She's mine. I have a daughter!" Butters stops pacing and covers his face with his hands, and Eric can't tell if he's laughing or crying.

Eric holds Lee close and cries. This means he gets to keep her. This means Butters truly was unfaithful to him, but he didn't care because he has Lee, and all he can think is how much he loves the tiny creature in his arms.

Butters is still crying, but he's overwhelmed by the sheer happiness that hit him when he saw that number. He has been trying to keep a level head, but now that he knows Lee's his, all he can do is cry. He wipes his eyes and his sobs turn to laughter. Eric gets up, he's laughing now too. He hands Lee over to him and Butters kisses her and holds her tightly. Eric pulls them into his arms and he and Butters kiss.

They aren't alone anymore. It isn't just them against everyone else. They have a daughter now. They're a family now.


	7. Chapter 6

**I really shouldn't be here, but I've written most of this chapter in the span of a couple of weeks so might as well share. **

**Still, don't expect much from me until May.**

**Anyways, thanks for sticking around, I really appreciate it!**

**Now enjoy, I own nothing, and reviews are nice!**

* * *

"Hey mom," Butters is on the phone in the living room. Eric sits next to him, Lee cradled in his arms. "Oh, we're both fine… Really? That's good to hear… Right… Actually, Eric and I have been talking about visiting you guys… Yep! That's kind of why I'm calling… I know, it has been a while, but we've been pretty busy… We were thinking next week… Yeah, that is soon, but Mom, I have something else to tell you… Everything is fine, but, uh, are you sitting down? …Haha, I'm not trying to scare you! … Is Dad there? … Okay, I just wanted to let you guys know that you have a granddaughter!"

Butters pulls the phone away from his ear and they can both hear the screams coming from the other end. They're both laughing at the reaction.

"Guys? … Yeah! … Well, it's a long story… I know, I'm sorry we didn't tell you sooner… That's why we're going to visit next week, so you can meet her and we can explain! … Her name is Lee… Well you'll see her next week! … Okay, we'll call you later with flight details, but I'll let you go so you can soak in the news… I love you too… Bye."

"Holy shit," Eric says, a grin on his face.

"I'm kind of terrified to expose her to them," Butters says, putting a finger in Lee's hand so she can grab it.

"It'll be fine, but if they try to ground you for cheating on me, I'm not going to stop them."

"That's fair."

. . . . .

When they arrive at the airport they see their parents waiting for them. Linda pushes Stephen and Liane out of her way so she's the first to see the baby in Butters' arms.

"She's perfect," Linda says, her hands to her mouth and her eyes watering.

"Congratulations you two," Stephen says, patting his son's shoulder.

"What a little angel," Liane says, petting Lee's hair.

"Can I hold her?" Linda asks. Butters hands her the baby. "Oh, so cute," she coos, kissing Lee's temple. "How could you keep such a sweet thing a secret from us?"

"We'll explain everything back at home," Butters tells them.

. . . . .

They're sitting at the dinner table in the Stotch's home while Butters and Eric get Linda and Stephen up to speed on everything they've been through in the last year.

Liane has Lee in her arms, feeding her, while she watches different expressions color Linda and Stephen's face.

"Why didn't you tell us any of this before?" Stephen asks.

Butters shrugs. "It's not exactly something I want to share if I can help it."

"Liane knew," Linda says, reproachful and hurt that she isn't the go-to mother for problems.

"The only reason she knew is because I needed someone to talk to, it wasn't because we purposefully wanted to hide something from you two," Eric says, not wanting to hurt his parent-in-law's feelings anymore.

"Honestly, I'm just glad everything has been resolved and we have this little angel in our lives now. And they told me about her the same time they told you," Liane chimes in.

Linda sighs and rolls her eyes, not content with that, but taking what she can.

. . . . .

Later that evening, Liane is on the couch with Lee, and Eric sits next to her while he lets Butters and his parents talk in private so they can unleash all their fury onto their son alone.

"Her eyes are amber," Liane says when Eric sits with her.

"Yeah, it's funny, isn't it?" Eric says, taking Lee from his mother's arms.

They can hear Linda's shrill voice coming from the kitchen.

"No matter how old he gets, they'll always treat him like a child, won't day?" Liane muses.

"Probably," Eric shrugs.

"You're able to talk about it more easily. You both are," she acknowledges now that she has a moment alone with her own son.

"Because of her," he says, looking down at his daughter who's reaching a tiny arm towards him and he reaches a finger for her to grab. "None of that matters anymore. And what would be the point of wanting her if I'm just going to hold what Butters did over both their heads? It was something that happened, but we have Lee now, and I do not resent anything having to do with her coming into our lives." Eric blows a kiss into Lee's cheek, causing her to laugh in delight. "Now if you'll excuse me, I think I need to change someone's diaper."

Eric gets up and head upstairs to Butters' old room, where they're going to spend the first two nights of their trip. The last two they'll be with Liane.

Liane watches him walk upstairs and turns her head towards the kitchen to hear Butters reason with his parents that he's too old to be grounded. She smiles.

. . . . .

"This is weird," Butters says in the dark of his old bedroom. He's cuddled next to Eric, Lee sleeping next to them, in his old crib his parents found in the attic. His mother diligently cleaned it in anticipation for their visit.

"What is?" Eric asks, an arm around him as he casually runs his fingers up and down Butters' side.

"I can still vividly remember you sneaking into my bedroom when we were teenagers just so you could sleep next to me. And you would leave before dawn so my parents wouldn't find out and ground me. Now we're adults who don't have to sneak around and our daughter is sleeping next to us in her crib. Weird."

"Yeah, I guess that is pretty weird," Eric agrees.

"Eric, I've been thinking, and obviously we'll need to really think about this, and I guess this isn't really an issue until Lee gets a little older, but, I don't know, what do you think about moving back to South Park?" Butters holds his breath. Eric is the one that had wanted to move away to begin with. He might not like this idea.

"Move back?"

"Like, when Lee is old enough to start school, we can move back and she can go to school here. And along with us she'll have her grandparents, and I just remember being a kid and being able to walk around and have it be safe. I don't know, it's just a thought."

Eric thinks about Butters proposal, and he thinks South Park is a thousand times more dangerous than Los Angeles could ever be, but that is mostly his own doing, he did always go out looking for trouble along with his friends.

"We should call Kenny tomorrow and see him," Eric says instead.

"Yeah! Wow, we haven't seen or talked to him in ages," Butters says, noticing the change in subject and allowing it. They have a few years to decide if they want to move back or not, no point in dwelling on it tonight.

. . . . .

Eric and Butters meet with Kenny at Café Monet the following afternoon.

"Holy shit, she's so cute," Kenny says, taking Lee from Eric's arm before sitting down. "I thought you were lying when you said you had a daughter now."

"Your wife couldn't join us?" Butters asks.

"No. She doesn't want to move at all. She's due in a month."

"Damn. Do you know what it's going to be yet?" Eric asks.

"A boy," Kenny smiles at them, and goes back to looking at Lee. "You guys were so adamant about not having kids. I'm glad you changed your mind."

A waiter comes and takes their orders and he hands Lee back over to Eric.

"Well, we really didn't have a choice in the manner. Lee was a bit of a surprise," Eric tells him.

"How the hell could she be a surprise?" Kenny asks, amused.

Over lunch, Butters and Eric explain to Kenny what's been going on with them for the past year. Lee is sitting in her car seat which Eric places on top of a regular seat, and Kenny holds her tiny hand while he's processing the tale he just heard.

"Fuck," Kenny says at last. He turns to his friends. "Well, if anyone can survive that shit, it's you two."

"Yeah, that's what we've been told," Eric says.

"Have you guys told Stan or Kyle?" Kenny asks.

"No. We haven't spoken to them in ages. Since they moved to New York," Butters says.

"Man, I haven't spoken to them either. It's crazy how easily you can lose track of people. I wonder if Stan and Wendy have a kid now, too?"

"Maybe. And speaking of losing track of people, Butters wants to move back to South Park," Eric says.

"That would be awesome. Nick will need a playmate," Kenny says, grinning and poking Lee's tummy.

"Well, we wouldn't move back right away, if we decide to do that. It would be in a few years," Butters clarifies.

Kenny shrugs. "Be rest assured that you two will be coming back to a much safer South Park, when you decide to."

"Is that so, Detective McCormick?" Eric asks, scoffing.

"I believe it," Butters says.

Kenny looks down at his watch. "Duty calls, gentlemen. I have to go, but I'm so glad you guys called me to have lunch. How much longer are you going to be here?"

"Three days," Butters says.

"Three days. Okay, well hopefully we can get dinner or something before you guys leave again," Kenny says.

He hugs both his friends and lightly tickles Lee's head.

"I'm glad you guys have her. I've always thought you two would make great parents. I'll see you later." Kenny heads out to his car.

"Well that's a lie," Eric says, picking at his dessert

"What is?" Butters asks, drinking the last of his coffee.

"That he always thought we'd make great parents."

"He really did, though. He started telling me that since high school."

"Really?" Eric doesn't believe him.

"I swear—Oh, can we get the check please?" Butters asks the waiter when he comes to clear their plates.

"Detective McCormick and his guests all eat here for free," the waiter tells them.

Butters and Eric look at each other.

"Shit, maybe we should move back," Eric says, handing his plate over to the waiter.

. . . . .

The two eat dinner with Kenny and his wife the third night at South Park and the fourth night they're in Liane's house. Butters has already fallen asleep in Eric's old bed, their luggage packed in the corner for their flight the following day.

Eric is sitting on the couch watching tv while his mom sits next to him, feeding Lee.

"So I heard you two talking about moving back to South Park," Liane says.

"Yeah, Butters wants to move back. It sounds like a good idea, but we have to talk about it some more," Eric says, not looking away from the tv.

"Well, if this is any incentive, I would absolutely love it if you decide to move back here. That way I would have you close again, and I would be able to see this little angel any time I want."

Eric turns to look at his mom and sees her wipe her eyes.

"Yeah, Butters was also saying it would be nice for her to have her grandparents close by."

"It would be nice, for her, to have all her family in one place," Liane says, leaning forward to leave the now empty bottle squeezed between the cushions of the couch.

She hands Lee over to Eric and gets up to wash the bottle. When she's done with that she goes back to the living room and kissed Eric's head.

"I'm going to sleep now, good night."

"Good night," Eric says.

Liane smiles and gently caresses Lee's head before going upstairs to her room.

Eric looks down at Lee, who's sleeping snug in his arms.

He feels embarrassed that it had never occurred to him that his mom would be lonely, living in South Park without him there. He lick the inside of his cheeks, thinking about sincerely moving back.

Lee squirms a little in his arms and decides it's time to go to bed.


End file.
